Alcoholic Monkey Forest, Bali

Prior to even stepping foot into the Alcoholic Monkey Forest, an aggressive alpha male threw himself onto my back, and swung from one arm to the next in a desperate, alcohol induced attempt to steal my Bali Hai Lager for himself. Little did he know that I too am an obsessive beer drinker, and so naturally I defended it. Bali Hai is my favourite Indonesian beer so far (that’s not saying much as there’s not much competition) so I clutched it with dear life, throwing him off me. I didn’t want to contribute to the alcoholism of monkeys.

Anybody travelling to Bali, Indonesia has to visit this insane habitat. It’s extremely touristy, but for a very good reason: the monkeys will climb on your head, eat from your hand, and rob distracted tourists of literally anything. One cheeky monkey even stole a lady’s mosquito repellent. They’ll undoubtedly go after your food, and water bottles – even if you’re clutching it tightly (they’ll simply gnaw your hand until you submit). I caught one peeking into my pocket, nearly stealing my money before I shushed it away.

The monkeys are everywhere, and have absolutely no shame. They’ll go from picking each others bums, to frantically humping one another without missing a beat. They’re social, adorable, and hilarious. It’s like no place we’ve ever been.

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