Prior to even stepping foot into the Alcoholic Monkey Forest, an aggressive alpha male threw himself onto my back, and swung from one arm to the next in a desperate, alcohol induced attempt to steal my Bali Hai Lager for himself. Little did he know that I too am an obsessive beer drinker, and so naturally I defended it. Bali Hai is my favourite Indonesian beer so far (that’s not saying much as there’s not much competition) so I clutched it with dear life, throwing him off me. I didn’t want to contribute to the alcoholism of monkeys.
Anybody travelling to Bali, Indonesia has to visit this insane habitat. It’s extremely touristy, but for a very good reason: the monkeys will climb on your head, eat from your hand, and rob distracted tourists of literally anything. One cheeky monkey even stole a lady’s mosquito repellent. They’ll undoubtedly go after your food, and water bottles – even if you’re clutching it tightly (they’ll simply gnaw your hand until you submit). I caught one peeking into my pocket, nearly stealing my money before I shushed it away.
The monkeys are everywhere, and have absolutely no shame. They’ll go from picking each others bums, to frantically humping one another without missing a beat. They’re social, adorable, and hilarious. It’s like no place we’ve ever been.
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